I’ve never been to therapy before - what should I expect?

First of all, welcome! Many of my clients are new to therapy, and I understand that taking the first step and reaching out to a counselor might feel intimidating, scary, vulnerable, or confusing. Initially, you can expect to have a brief phone consultation, where we both can determine whether it would be a good fit to move forward. You’ll have the opportunity to ask me any questions you have and tell me a little bit about what you’re looking to get out of counseling. If you decide after our consultation that you’d like to wait or continue looking at other therapists, I will not be offended! It’s important that you feel comfortable and connected with your therapist, and everyone has different preferences. If we do set up an initial session, in the first meeting I’ll ask you about your history and current symptoms and experiences, so that we can begin to create a treatment plan and set goals and priorities.

What is a counseling session like? Do I have to prepare for my sessions?

Many of my clients wonder how counseling sessions will be structured. I tend to be a flexibly structured therapist, meaning, I will come to a session with ideas or resources related to the goals that we’ve set. However, at the beginning of the session, I’ll always ask a client if there’s anything they’d like to talk about or process through - it is, after all, “your session!” Some clients find it beneficial to write in a journal or the notes section of their phone in between sessions, to reflect and organize their thoughts for our meetings. I will also sometimes assign therapeutic “experiments” in-between sessions, for clients who are looking to continue their work outside of when we meet.

If we have decided collaboratively that EMDR would be a helpful treatment modality, I will follow the guidelines of the 8 phases of treatment (see the page: What is EMDR?). However, the pacing that we take will vary from client to client. Some clients will not want to rush into the memory desensitization and reprocessing stages and will spend more time on preparation and rapport building. Some clients who have solid resources and support may want to do several back-to-back processing sessions to move more quickly through traumatic material, while others might want to intermix with talk sessions or outdoor sessions. There is no one “right” way!

How long until I start to feel better?

This is a great question! Understandably, many clients wonder, when can I expect to start feeling better? The answer to this varies client by client. Oftentimes, when clients first start coming to therapy sessions, they may feel “worse” before they feel better. Many of us have learned coping mechanisms that, while protective and at times helpful, have blocked us from accessing our feelings fully. Sometimes we’ve compartmentalized painful experiences in order to survive and get by. Therapy can bring these painful thoughts, emotions, and experiences to the surface, revealing what has been there all along, in order to heal. Many clients report that within 3 months of consistent therapy, they are noticing progress on their goals and a reduction in their symptoms. For clients who have complex or childhood trauma, it may take a little longer. Sometimes reminding yourself that even having the courage to show up and commit to “the work” is a major accomplishment can be helpful in the initial stages. I’ll check in frequently with you to make sure that you’re seeing the benefit of therapy and make changes if needed.

I see your office is at a church. Are you a Christian counselor?

I do not identify as a Christian counselor. However, I enjoy and feel comfortable exploring meaning-making, purpose, and spiritual connection in our sessions, if that feels meaningful to you. For some clients, their religious or spiritual beliefs are key resources in healing. Others have endured trauma in religious spaces, or are questioning religious doctrines that no longer (or perhaps never) “fit.” I will meet you where you are. I have chosen to work at Allendale because I align with their vision of social justice, inclusivity, and advocacy for marginalized peoples.